{"id":4665,"date":"2019-02-03T16:22:22","date_gmt":"2019-02-03T16:22:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/"},"modified":"2026-01-28T19:16:05","modified_gmt":"2026-01-28T19:16:05","slug":"manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/","title":{"rendered":"Manter o equil\u00edbrio do desequil\u00edbrio"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cTo dream the impossible dream,<\/em>
\nTo bear with unbearable sorrow,<\/em>
\nTo run where the brave dare not go,<\/em>
\nTo right the unrightable wrong(\u2026),<\/em>
\nTo try when your arms are too weary,<\/em>
\nto reach the unreachable star,<\/em>
\nthis is my quest.\u201d<\/em><\/h4>\n

Don Quixote de La Mancha<\/h4>\n

 <\/p>\n

Think about that issue or problem that has been around for a long time \u2026<\/p>\n

Now imagine what your life would have been like if you had already solved it \u2026<\/p>\n

We all have problems or issues we do not like to talk about (we tend to avoid them) or which we do not wish to confront (not even in our deepest thoughts); \u201cDon\u2019t even remind me of that,\u201d \u201cIt\u2019s not even worth talking about it\u2026\u201d; \u201cI fear bringing it up\u201d; \u201cI know it makes me suffer, but to solve it, I would have to change my entire life.\u201d<\/p>\n

And so, we swallow up the bitter pill and endure the suffering (therefore increasing) the sorrow, the anger, the resentment, the anguish or the amount of unresolved past events. (indeed, the past is always solved \u2026 it is only emotionally unresolved.)<\/p>\n

Accept, bite the bullet and bear the pain! This is the favourite strategy of emotional \u201cSupermen\/women\u201d, who believe they can endure all the suffering by themselves, \u201cI won\u00b4t speak about this to anyone, I can bear the pain and solve my problems on my own;\u201d \u201cNo one understands me \u2026\u201d; \u201cWhat\u00b4s the point of speaking about it, if it doesn\u2019t take away my pain and solve my problems\u201d; \u201cI don\u00b4t trust anyone to talk about it\u201d (because being emotionally dependent on someone can also be a daunting feeling).<\/p>\n

Today is February 13rd, 2019 \u2026 if we do not do it today, we will never be given the opportunity to relive this day in a pleasant and healthy way (physically and psychologically). However, for some of us, this is just another day in which everything will remain the same (even if everything is wrong), because everything seems stable, organized and balanced, \u201cDespite the fact that I know I should do something to change, although it hurts and makes me suffer, I already know what I am dealing with\u201d. It only seems stable and balanced \u2026 but it is not! Otherwise it would not make us suffer.<\/p>\n

This is one of life\/defence strategies adopted by people who feel insecure, powerless and fearful (change, even theoretically for the better, causes suffering, and therefore generates fear). It is a strategy that I call \u00abmaintaining imbalance balanced\u00bb \u2026 deep down we know and feel that everything is not right, that we have to take action and change, but we continue to live our lives as if nothing really needs to be changed, and therefore nothing changes (although deep within us we continue to complain about life and its vicissitudes).<\/p>\n

Underlying the \u201cmask\u201d of strength, determination and assurance (\u201cI have already endured it for many years without complaining!\u201d) is often its opposite \u2026 fear, powerlessness and helplessness, which impair our ability to react, just because we do not have the courage to reach out to someone, tackle a problem or deal with a painful feeling.<\/p>\n

On the one hand, if the problem seems to be complicated, we tend to come up with complex (frightening) solutions, but sometimes we are surprised at how easy it was to come up with a solution. Think for example how a single drop of water can stop a highly sophisticated electronic mechanism.
\nOn the other hand, if the problem causes a lot of emotional pain, but it seems easy to solve, we tend to think that it cannot be that simple (that is, often problems are worsened by our thoughts).<\/p>\n

Change hurts! It\u2019s inevitable. But for some, fear makes them think and accept (this is the real problem) that change is far more painful than enduring the pain of not changing at all! And immersed in this contagious thought (because it contaminates all other thoughts) they continue persistently and laboriously (but painfully) in their difficult task of maintaining balance, although there is an imbalance in the way they live their life, which inevitably leads to a deviation of who they really are and would wish to be, and therefore it ends up making them suffer far more than they would if they made the change they have been trying so hard to avoid!
\nMany times, when we think, \u201cI stopped feeling happy when this happened \u2026\u201d, the real life-changing question should be \u201cHow can I feel good, fulfilled and happy again, even though this has happened \u2026?<\/p>\n

Rolando Andrade
\nClinical Psychologist
\nPsychotherapist
\nSports Psychologist<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

C\u00e9dula profissional O.P.P 4365<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Por isso muitas vezes, quando pensamos “Deixei de me sentir feliz quando aconteceu isto\u2026”, a verdadeira quest\u00e3o transformadora deva ser “Como posso voltar a sentir-me bem, realizado e feliz, apesar de ter acontecido isto\u2026?”.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4666,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[224],"tags":[240,241,242,243,244,245,229,230,239,246],"class_list":["post-4665","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psicologia-clinica","tag-desamparo","tag-desespero","tag-dor-mental","tag-equilibrio","tag-mudanca","tag-pensamento","tag-psicologia-clinica","tag-psicoterapia","tag-saude-mental","tag-sofrimento"],"yoast_head":"\nManter o equil\u00edbrio do desequil\u00edbrio - Rolando Andrade<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Manter o equil\u00edbrio do desequil\u00edbrio - Rolando Andrade\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Por isso muitas vezes, quando pensamos "Deixei de me sentir feliz quando aconteceu isto\u2026", a verdadeira quest\u00e3o transformadora deva ser "Como posso voltar a sentir-me bem, realizado e feliz, apesar de ter acontecido isto\u2026?".\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Rolando Andrade\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/psirolandoandrade\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-02-03T16:22:22+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-01-28T19:16:05+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/equilibrist-1831016_1920.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1920\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1459\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Rolando Andrade\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Rolando Andrade\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Rolando Andrade\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/#\/schema\/person\/f91b3a1f85add42b358d5e9df3aa433a\"},\"headline\":\"Manter o equil\u00edbrio do desequil\u00edbrio\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-02-03T16:22:22+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-01-28T19:16:05+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\"},\"wordCount\":782,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/equilibrist-1831016_1920.png\",\"keywords\":[\"desamparo\",\"desespero\",\"dor mental\",\"equilibrio\",\"mudan\u00e7a\",\"pensamento\",\"Psicologia Cl\u00ednica\",\"psicoterapia\",\"sa\u00fade mental\",\"sofrimento\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Psicologia Cl\u00ednica\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/rolandoandrade.com\/en\/2019\/02\/03\/manter-o-equilibrio-do-desequilibrio\/\",\"name\":\"Manter o equil\u00edbrio do desequil\u00edbrio - 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